selon a moi

Like Totally

2007-01-13T22:37:00.000-08:00

Shit well it's been ages once again but now that ns is over i guess i'll start blogging again. Fickle minded i am. Anyway i was reading my past posts and shit man i made a lot of grammatical errors and typo errors. I guess that's just a part of my lazy nature. Anyway today is gonna be a lazy sunday; like every other sunday....

Well NS is finally fucking over. Shit man i'm so fucking glad that it's over. I mean fuck man. No more having to take taxi to camp (I stayed out and i was too lazy to take a bus early in the morning so i took a cab everyday). Shit man i think i blew about $3000 on taxis. So i'm glad i'm out of ns cos now i no longer have to take taxis anymore. Like poor me! (Self-pity) Poor me got to stay out. Phew... My bank account depleted by $5000 since the day i entered army. That's really sad.

Well my pimples have gotten better haha. It's not so bad now. Previously i could say that i had 100 pimples on my face and i wouldn't be lying. Now i can say that i have 20 and i would be lying! Yeah baby! Awesome. but 19 would be pushing it.....zzzz

Well anyway hm.... let me talk about ns a little bit. In terms of actual skills, i think i learned absolutely nothing. I mean i learned how to fold camo nets and scold people CB, but apart from that nothing solid. However i did learn something i guess. I learned more about myself. You know this might sound really stupid.... OK the number one lesson that i learned was!!! I really dun like to do the things that i dun like to do. Like shit man I really dun like to fold camo nets and shit I REALLY DUN LIKE TO FOLD CAMO NETS. So i think from now on i'm really gonna plan my life out carefully. I really dun wanna end up doing something i hate. That's why i'm thinking real hard as to whether or not i should to do law. Shit man ns really teaches you that you have to make the right decisions and that you should spend your life doing things you like and wanna DO!

Well i also learned another thing. I'm a nice guy haha. Well many people who i worked with during ns thought that i was a lazy fucking asshole which.... I AM. But you know there are so many ways to look at something. I take it like hey you know by not doing things and looking like a slacker and an asshole it makes them look good. Like i remember Weiting complaining that i cleaned the toilet like a fucking retard. But hey man think of it this way. Now that puts him in the good light while making me look bad. I mean what kind of friend would do that: Make themselves look bad so that their friends look good. Gives him the chance to get toilet cleaner of the year award! Shit man only me!! I'm truly a nice guy. One in a million. Muah i give myself a kiss.

Well i've been playing tennis. I'm not really good but at least i'm not an asshole when i play. playing with my dad was terrible haha. He would hit the ball out and scold me for not returning it. I mean it's pretty hard to return a ball that lands BEHIND you. Well if you play tennis you would know what i mean.

Anyway shit i have something else to write but i'll write it the next time. Getting kinda tired and i wanna comtemplate about things.

Looking back

2006-04-09T07:50:00.000-07:00

Hey! Well i haven't blogged in a long time. I think eversince i left that god foasaken keat hong camp i haven't. You know When i read my past posts i'm at least very proud of something that i have donw. I was very true to myself and i was very honest with my writing. It wasn't the best but i was very honest.

Well i really have nothing to say cos i basically have told my friends everything. I guess i just wanted to blog

LONG TIME

2005-08-15T18:57:00.000-07:00

Ok i'm back but not for long......

It's been one whole long month since I last blogged but you really can't blame me for not doing so. I have been so busy doing nothing. It's a a new concept i learned while at army. It's actually possible!

Well i obviously learned even more lessons. First of all, is trust nobody once again. haha. Ok this is an old one. That stupid fucker! I think everyone knows who i'm talking about. Mister "say nice things infront of your face, say complete fucking bullshit when you turn your back away."

Oh yeah as a consequence of the above i also have learnt that i don't owe anyone anything. I'm just gonna be happy and live my life to the fullest. I don't owe anyone anything!!!! People will just say and do things for their own benefit. Of course donm't be selfish like mr lazy bones, but seriously no point feeling guilty about things beyond your control.

I think some people deserve to be shot. Like mr "i'm so sincere i really wanna help but i can't cos it's beyond my control" Now this fucker is one hell of a fucker. I think he should be shot 7 times in the back and left there to bleed to death.

I realised some people can be so stupid and some people can be so lazy. I can forgive when only one or the other is present, but when both are............

A good quote. Desmond" Billy, were you born from an asshole or a vagina? " This is pure genius.

People can acually shit in the shower cubicle and in the urinals. LIKE WTF. and when they do shit in the proper place, they shit on the toilet seat. When they do shit in the toilet bowl, they don't flush it! LIKE WTF WTF

Oh yeah WTF is my new catch phrase!

OK gtg run will blog again

At Peace

2005-07-10T02:28:00.000-07:00

OK I have been at home for about 3.5 months now an i'm finally going back to Keat Hong Camp on Sunday night which is actually today. geez it's that late already.. I have no comment because i'm sure everyone must know how I feel...

I didn't actually accomplish much other than reading 9 books and blogging a little which is very sad for a period of 3.5 months but oh well.. What can i do? However, i must say that i have done quite a fair bit of soul searching. I feel so at peace now because i have learnt some of my biggest lessons yet by merely comtemplating about my past and what I am going through right now

Lesson 1: Forgive and forget. The only one who suffers is you when you don't forgive someone. He or she is simply not going to feel your unforgiveness and suffer from mental stress from it, you are.

lesson 2: Life is too short to be pissed off. Before you know it, you will have a heart attack and trust me you'll be looking back at your youthful years wondering why you spent so many years being pissed off. Life is short so embrace is and be happy man. Ok it's harder whe actually being carried out, but trust me with practise it can be achieved haha....

lesson 3: Don't be so naive. Don't be so fucking NAIVE.I'm not saying trust no one, but seriously before you open your golden mouth, htink very carefuly. I think i have been such a fool at times to have trusted some people with some information. I guess my problem is that i talk too much and i really am very immature for my age. I don't wanna live a life of regret of whatever i have done wrong but I wanna make sure that i will have no more reason to regret in the future....

lesson 4: Confidence... HOW THE FUCK CARES ANYMORE! I dunno why i actually care now a days. I really shouldn't. I'm just gonna be a new age confident looi wen zhen from now on.

lesson 5: There will always be more lessons to learn.

2 issues

2005-07-07T00:49:00.000-07:00

First i really don't wanna go back to camp cos it's gonna be so damn weird. I enjoy sitting at home doing nothing. Doing nothing is just my kind of thing.

and I really don't wanna be ungreateful for anything anymore. It's all about having a positive attitude and just accepting things as they come.

hm..

2005-06-30T00:14:00.000-07:00

http://selonatoutlemonde.blogspot.com

Well leave your comments if you have anything to say.

Honkies

2005-06-27T01:05:00.000-07:00

Ok the first thing you learn in GP is that one should never generalise. I don't intend to make this entry a total Anti-Honkie shallacking but, I just want to say a few thing which I have noticed.

Something which I don't understand is the plethora of honkies who are Anti-Singapore. They believe that Sinagpore is the biggest shit hole in the earth where human rights is practically non-existant. I can't blame them but I am pretty stunned by what some honkies can say.

"I will never even think of stepping foot on Singapore." This is what some honkie said. I was pretty shocked. Immediately an image of a 12 year old saying these words was conjured. The reality however is that this guy was around 40 years old. Is Singapore that horrible a place to live in? Is Hong Kong so great? Sure the Wanton noodles are pretty good and yeah I wouldn't mind seeing Maggie Q there but what the hell makes them think Hong Kong is so great? Geez just because freedom of expression is an issue, someone says I won't ever think of coming to Singapore. It's extremely childish and immature. Their sense of reality has become extremely deluded by their utopian ideals of democracy and what feedom is supposed to be.

It's funny that when one becomes so rapt up in promoting something, they eventually lose sight of what they are promoting and just concentrate on promoting it. If Honkies believe so much in democracy then should realise what democracy stands for equality and the right for EVERYONE'S voice to be heard. Is this really what is happening in the so-called democracies of the world? I'm quite sure that the blacks in America aren't exactly cared for that much. The whims of the large corporations are what the elected governemnt tries to satisfy. They elected a leader who doesn't care about what the the UN voted. Even against the wishes of the UN, Bush still invaded Iraq. How come Bush doesn't get trailed for war crimes? Geez talk about hypocrisy.

There is so much more to say but i'll have to carry on some other day. Ciaoz

Irony

2005-06-26T22:02:00.000-07:00

You know the world is one big irony. I was just having a flash back to secondary school where someone passed a comment about someone being judgemental. This is highly contradictory because for someone to call someone else judgemental, one would have to judge that person first. Hey you, you like to judge others, but I like to judge you... right....

What would someone do for popularity. Recently people have wanted their blogs to be read by about 2000 people everyday. They'll bitch about others that everyone knows about. They'll put naked pictures of themsleves on their blog. They photoshop their pictures to look from Maggie to a not so Maggie. Maggie is of course the super Ah Lian or ultra Honkie name that Ah Lians or Honkies like. Imagine saying Maggie in a honkie accent. Maggie Ah.

What is it with wanting attention? What does it actually accomplish? Yeah, i'm popular and when I walk down orchard road, everyone will know who I am. Never mind that half the population thinks i'm a spoilt bitch, a super Ah lian and a super Ang Moh Sucker. Yeah you really are very popular. Enjoy it. Cheers and pop the champagne bottle.

Next entry, about honkies.

Mother Fucker

2005-06-24T18:27:00.000-07:00

You know what a Mother Fucker is? I know what a Mother fucker is. It's an Mo who refuses to downgrade someone with a torn ligament. That's what a Mother Fucker is. I have absolutely no idea what the fuck his problem is. My letter said that I went for ankle reconstruction surgery, which indicates a severity in the extent of my injury. Even with this said, he insists that the letter must include the words "torn ligament". This is so stupid because the fact that I went for ankle reconstruction surgery points to the fact that I tore a ligement. Now for someone who went through 5 years of medical school and someone who has 5 years of work experience he must be either a Mother Fucking Asshole Fucking Asshole, or just incredibly Mother Fuckily Stupid. I really have no idea.

Intricate web of emotions.

2005-06-22T02:44:00.000-07:00

You know i'm really wondering: what do we really want in life? I'm quite sure that all of us want to be happy. Happiness can be derived from a lot of things. Having a lot of money and power. Being as handsome as Brad Pitt. Having the body of Angelina Jolie. Having the legs of Cameron Diaz. Being as smart as Albert enstein. These are all things that we want in life. When we posses theese things, we become happy. Why? I think it's because we feel that we will get more attention from others. Who doesn't want someone to say, " Whoa you are so smart, show me how to do this math problem." We are in constant fear of being not good enough. We study hard to prove to everyone that we are smart. Girls wear make up to make themselves more attractive. Guys spend hours at the gym to beef up their bodies so that girls can drool over them. What for? Because, it makes us feel good about ourselves.Whoa someone is looking at me. This is normally the case. During prom i bet every girl was flattered when someone said, "whoa you look stunning in that dress."

However, is this really always the case? We spend an insane amount of time trying to look good to impress others. What for? What does it really serve in the end. Yeah you are happy when someone says you look good but isn't really worth all the time? I'm quite sure the amount of stress when we look in the mirror and see something we don't like overrides the happiness derived.

I don't know why i'm writing this but maybe because i have suddenly realised that i'm changing a little. I never used to look in the mirror. I never used to care about how tall i was. I never cared about how smart people thought i was. Like who he hell gave a shit about all these things. All i cared about was being the street fighter champion.

I guess things change.

Absolutely random thoughts

2005-06-21T22:46:00.000-07:00

Well I feel like dancing.
I wonder what it's like to be a girl.
I want to experience PMS once. Sounds fun. You can scold and yell at people and blame it on PMS
I feel like shitting. Maybe i should go shit.
I feel insecure.
Very inseucre
I dunno why but i do. Maybe listening to linkin park songs makes me fell this way.
Er i dunno i'm kinda bored and feel emtpy inside right now.
I feel that i have so many things to prove to everyone
It's driving me crazy i guess

Cheapskado

2005-06-18T21:42:00.000-07:00

Muahaha, i feel like such a cheapskado. I sat in borders today and finished half a book. Tmr i'm gonna go again and finish the remainder haha.... MUahaha Muahhaa

Soya Proteins

2005-06-16T00:14:00.000-07:00

Whoa kick ass dude, i'm beginning to love Pasir Panjang more and more. I was disappointed when video EZy disappeared, but here comes my new saviour: The soya ice cream! No longer do i have to travel to venezia for ice cream. On the second level of the pasir panjang shopping mall, one can find high quality soya ice cream! Delicious though i must admit that the texture is rather bizarre. It's as sticky as melted chesse. It twirls round and round like mozerella out of the oven. The banana tastes comes first but after that the soya tastes comes in. Well anyway it's pretty neat stuff. They make their own ice cream so it's really suited for the taste of their customers. Delicious. Time to beef up on my soya proteins!

Well i was teaching Michelle French today. Haha it's prety funny cos i learnt a lot of things by teaching her french. I learned the word for kitchen and a few grammar rules that i forgot. Well i give myself a grading of 4/5 for my teaching skills. MUaHAhA. I should receive an outstanding teachers award.

Apart from that life is ok i guess ciaoz

Jaded

2005-06-15T13:53:00.000-07:00

Geez i wonder what it's like to be Paris Hilton. I wish my dad owned a hotel also. I can just sit on my ass and watcht he money roll in. Make a few sex videos and hold 3 parties for my birthday around the world. Paris Hilton, a new age modern spectacle. I wonder how long more she can take all of this befroe she simply becomes jaded. The bored upper class that is so rich and simply doesn't know what to do with their lives. They don't need to work, so that means that they have a lot more free time. They don't do anything by themselves so they don't know how to do anything. They just sit on their ass and have a good time. I guess after a while it's possible to be sick of having fun

The Rainmaker

2005-06-13T16:19:00.000-07:00

Well i just finished reading the rain maker and boy was I impressed by how good it was. It was nothing to fancy to that effect but it managed to draw me and and never ever bored me. I don't mind reading stories like this once in a while. A very ordinary story given an extraordinary touch. I guess it's quite different from Dan Brown as the latter prefers to discuss about controvertible issues.

Well just to end this off, I give it 4.5/5. I recommmend this book to anyone who has a vague interest in Law. Well I'm off to Holland to pick up digital fortress and return this book to the book shop. I'm supposed to meet Michelle today. Don't know if she has recovered from her flu yet though.

?

2005-06-12T21:11:00.000-07:00

I just thought of something today. Religion is supposed to pacify us. Make us believe that we should do good deeds and treat others fairly and just the way we would like others to treat us. However quite frankly it has done the opposite. Countless wars have been fought between Christians and Muslims. Muslims and Hindus. The list is just endless. Is this ironial or not?
More often then not, we don't care or give a shit what is being taught. We just say hey i'm christian and my reiligion is the true one and therefore anyone else is stupid. I'm muslim mine is the light the path, if one were to believe otherwise, one would be a fool. It no longers becomes about what is taught but about who is right. Some many zealously will preach about how true their god is but never preach about what god teaches. I just read this website today that says buddhism is nothing it's just mumbo jumbo. I found that very ironical because it was a christian website and the bible teaches people to love and respect their neighbour. Again it's a war on who's religion is better. We have even forgotten what it stand for. This is very sad.

Some say, not this is not what god teaches, this is just someone who has gone astray and misinterpreted god's words. This is the very point. We all create our own deductions and when we are not happy when someone else has a different view point we call them stupid. Maybe it's human nature, i don't know. This is not only applicable when talking about religion. So many protestors around the world talk about reform for better govt and freedom of rights, freedom from oppression. This is noble however almost all of them use violence to make themselves heard and this is very hypocritical.

So my point is that sometimes we need to look at the issue at hand and try to understand it before jumping in to take action.

Teenage dirtbag

2005-06-10T11:43:00.000-07:00

OMG i just realised something. Ok it's not a big deal but holy shit. I'm spending the last 2 yearsof my teenage life in NS. Like is that shit or is that shit? No. No more being immature and being a pompous jack ass when we are 20. That's just unacceptable. FUCK!!!! I'm actually close to tears. Like all those childish years! So fun.......... I'm serious..... I think this really sucks... I wanna be a dumb ass and have teenage problems again.

1) Like having those times where you go whoa man i'm gonna ask that girl out, ok no oh yes oh no...
2) Being the dick in the class
3) bitching about teachers
4) bitching about that bitch who bitches about you cos she thinks you are a bitch.
5) Complaining about shitty food
6) Complaining about the front office woman who's a rude bitch
7) Trying to find out who's secretely mugging.
8) Secretely mugging haha
9) trying to look nice in the school photo
10) Being a teenage stupid ass
11) Having a "tiny" crush on your french class teacher!.

Well gtg Ciaoz

I've finally done it

2005-06-01T16:57:00.000-07:00

I have finally entered the damn joint admissions site, a million clicks and punching in of identification and confirmations but it is finally done. I have chosen Law finally. Surprisingly it wasn't as hard as I thought it would have been. I only took about one minute to reflect and think about it. So this could mean 2 things, I am cocksure about doing law and somehow my intuition in just telling me it's the right thing to do, or i'm just to cocky and believe that I can do something I can't. Which ever it is i simply don't know. I guess the phrase you'll never know unless you try couldn't be more eptly chosen for this situation.

On other issues, my poor friend Srinivas has just sent me a sms. I feel really sorry for him. He is in signals and was so far having a good time. Now he has just been transferred to some company and he says it's hell. Sigh that evokes memories of my one week in armour. Pure shit. Well on other issues my other friend Edmond also had extremely bad news thrown into his face a few days ago. He's some ammo specialist. sounds damn cool hey. Well it was until they told him that during reservice he'll be going for an infantry conversion course. That's 3 extra months of reservice

On the last issue. On a night of glamour and fame where 81 of the mosy beautiful women of the world congregate ( This year being Thailand ) to show off their bodies and all too perfetc faces, a severe injustice has happened. Miss Canada won Miss universe. Like oh my god. Out of the 5 finalists, 4 were latin american and guess what, the north american takes the crown. GEEZ am I surprised. I bet the 6/12 judges who were guess what american voted in favour for her. Puerto Rico and Mexico were like 50 millions times more pretty than canada. Mexico looked like a mixture of rahcel from s club 7 and mariah carey. Miss canada was at best a brunette anna Kornikova and alanis morisette. Not even a pittance of fair enough in the decision.

Deception point

2005-05-31T08:37:00.000-07:00

I've just finished reading deception point by Dan Brown and I must say that I am Really impressed by it.
4.5/5

He is bold in this story. Very interesting and original in the way it presents himself. Since this books is about NASA and American poilitics it proved to be a worthwhile read as yet again the end product is a melange of fictional story telling and well researched facts about the American military capabilities. So there are 2 things that keep you spellbounded by the book. One is the story itself and the ingenious plot the second is the repetoire of astounding facts. Things ranging from micro flying bots the size of a mosquito which can transmit audio and video signals to super transport jets flying at march 3 can be found in this book.

Perhaps another reason this book is so captivating is because although it is a thriller, the herione is not some CIA operative with superhuman powers. She is merely a staff of the White House who has to overcome problems merely by her intelligence on-the-heel intuition.

I only have one of his 4 novels left to read. Digital Fortress which I am going to grab a copy of as soon as I can. The funny thing is that none of us would have even known of him had it not been for The Da Vinci code. This book came out before that but it has only become popular now. The power of being famous. All of a sudden of you work becomes the best the world has ever seen over night.

Indifference

2005-05-31T00:38:00.000-07:00

I believe that there is a fine line between indifference and trying to run away from the blatant truth. How do we distinuish the 2? I have absolutely no idea. Indifference has actually become a skill now a days. When we want to run away from something we just say, ah fuck it, i don't give a shit. The mere fact that you are using the word fuck probably means that you do give a fuck.

I love indifference, it helps me to solve all my problems. When i am sad i just say, who the fuck cares. It solves all my problems. How ever for some reason, these problems keep on resurfacing and then an even stronger i don't give a fuck had to be used.............

Well ok whatever man

More nice quotes

2005-05-29T00:36:00.000-07:00

" yeah if girls don't have big breasts they are no fun to be with."
- 11 year old being interviewed in a documentary in the discovery channel.

" She's the worst kind of bitch, she's an ugly bitch"
- Anonymous talking about anonymous.... Ok i don't condone such thinking but it's funny cos it's simply the reality of our super shallow and materialistic world. Like it's ok to be a bitch if one is pretty... dumb fuckers........

" They don't have the right to wear nice clothes, they are ugly"
- Just to emphasize on our value for external beauty..... We praise the outside too much often forgetting about the value of the inside.

Well life's like that..... We should all just die.

Angels and Demons

2005-05-29T00:27:00.000-07:00

I love Dan Brown's writing. He is able to fuse together fact and fiction in an interesting away. All his books are page turners. You just can't wait to find out what's next. Maybe that's because he has this style of creating a question and then only answering it like a hundred pages later. I guess that's a pretty good sytle of writing, Another thing which i like about his books is that he can vividly describe a scene or an object and at the same time not over do. He does it just enough for you to be able to picture it properly.

On another note i just wactched star wars. I thought it was ok only. Maybe it was due to bad acting or a bad scirpt i have no idea. Well for the sake of entertainment it was good. Worth my $9.50 cents..... Typical story of how greed for power can turn someone into a monster, but i believe that if one were to think about it carefully, it really does portray human beings quite well. Sometimes we innocently become ensnared in this race for power. Anything can beget our urge for it. Perhaps it's simply greed, maybe it's for a good cause. Whatever the reason it can turn us into the very thing we were fighting against. Many leaders around the world were once good people, fighting for a cause they believed in: freedom, democracy or human rights. In the end, all of them practically become the dictator they were trying to over throw in the first place. It's a shitty fact of life but true

I wonder how angelic the demon really is and how demonic the angel is.....

Pimples

2005-05-28T00:05:00.000-07:00

Why do we have pimples? Can someone please fucking explain this to me. Does it serve any purpose? I know we have fevers to counter viral infection and such but do pimples really serve and purpose?

Ok from now on no more milk- i'll take soya
shellfish
chocolate
spicyfood

My life sucks

interim, provisional

2005-05-27T01:03:00.000-07:00

I just stumbled upon a thought just now, everything in this world is temporary. When you enjoy and savour every bit of that cheese cake, you'll only enjoy it when you taste buds taste it. When you are rock climbing, the exhilaration only stays when you are climbing. When you are on top, exhilaration is superseded by accomplishment. When you have sex, the orgasm only lasts for that time being.... Ok not that i would know, but geez i read my sister's magazines.

So why do we all still strive for these seconds of gratification? Why don't we all seek something that gives us long time fulfillment? Some people will say I believe in god and this is my sanctuary. I am satisfied everyday because I know god is by my side. Is this really true? Do you feel that you are happy all the time? Even when someone believes that god is there all the time then why do our emotions let us down. Why does reality let us down? We cannot truely and sincerely be happy all the time. I'm not trying to prove that what goes up must come down, but trying to point out that we cannot ever be in one static state. Things change all the time. We are in constant motion as time ticks by.

On another issue, balance. Ok well the other day Iwas talking to Srinivas about balance again. I was discussing with him about yin and yang, heaven and hell and well yes equilibirum. There can never be too much of either as the world simply won't work. Too much democracy and the world would be in anarchy. If we were to follow a system of pure communism, it wouldn't work either. For if everyone was equal, who would impose it? Earth is like a balance of heaven and hell. We are a product of equilibrium. Too much glamour, fame and cash always leads to depression. Though we are happy for our sucess, something will always revert out happiness back to despondancy or desolation. Ok fine I guess people drenched in melancholic circumstances would like to beg to differ. Some say there is no end to their despair and that no matter how hard they try, the misery they are suffering will always drag them back into it. So like where the fuck is the poise in that? Too much sadness would probably lead to suicide which is a way in which we try to end our sadness to return back to equilibrium. So it is out constant search for it that practically begets it.

I don't want to argue with those who say, life is not fair, some have everything. Brains, the J.LO Butt, the Angelina Jolie body and Bill gates cash. Fine you will want all of this, but if i asked someone, hey do you want to be anyone of them? I bet many would say, what the fuck i wanna be me. Why? moderation. Do we really want all of these things? Geez i sound like my home econs teacher. " A healthy diet is one that is balanced and one that is moderated and not too extreme." Well I guess her words actually apply to all real life situations. We definitely don't want to have 10000 trillion dollars, ok fine well i don't want that kind of cash, but yeah i wouldn't want to be in pocession of only one dollar either. I don't want a half inch dick but yeah i wouldn't want a 12 inch one either.

Well I guess maybe equilibrium is just something that is necessary for our world to exist. At the same time, I guess since we need balance, things will always change. If one thing changes, another has to change to keep it. Just like energy cannot be created or destroyed. There will always be BALANCE....

Ok i don't believe that i just spent half an hour talking about this but yeah i did................

A triumph of an idea

2005-05-24T16:12:00.000-07:00

I was reading this book yesterday about globalisation and westernization of ideas and beliefs. The thoughts and ideas in the book are good but i gave up reading it after 17 pages because it was too difficult to understand. It was originally french so the direct translations were a bit imcomprehensible. Well anyway, i got the jist of the whole thing and much of it really makes sense

Western Supremacy- A triumph of an idea?
This book in no way points a finger at western arrogance for the 9/11 events, and neither does it just single out Osama Bin Landen as the sole cause of it. What it tries to do, is understand the history of westernisation, and how people are affected by it. The main idea behind the book is how basically everything in the world is a product of westernisation. Our thoughts and beliefs of what is acceptable and what is not all follows the guidelines of the western world. This could be due to the fact that in general the west controls the media or perhaps it is because in the early 19th century where colonial rule was apparent in everypart of the world, western ideas proliferated. The west saw it their duty to "educate the lesser civilised nations".

The UN is largely dominated by western powers with only China in the permanent security council. This western pre-dominence can be viewed quite easily by President George W.Bush and his war on Iraq which was by no means sanctioned by the international community. Yet, can anyone do anything to stop the world's largest if not only super power? The answer is quite simply no, Bush has not be trailed for crimes against humanity and for slaugherting innocent people in Iraq and quite frankly speaking he will never be. I don't think that after world war 2, any country has invaded another country without having to face the consequences. Even if the question was not one about legality, definitly the question of morality resides in all our minds.

Who here really believes that bush invaded Iraq to liberate an oppressed people? I think the honest answer is simply no one. First of all let us look at all the suffering that is happening throughout Africa amd Asia. Abject poverty and corruption is rampant through out practically every country in these 2 continents, and i'm quite sure Bush's billions spent on the War on Iraq could have been used to alleviate the suffering of millions in these countries. The civil war in Congo has practically shattered the lives of millions and famine in Ethiopia has taken the lives of countless victims. What the the US do? At most it sends food and money that probably just ends up in the hands of corrupt officials, and that's the way they want it. They want to keep the 3rd world poor. Those in the 3rd world are simply destined to be poor for generations to come.

So what makess Iraq so special? Well the answer is obviously Oil. Already large American companies have been given the green light to start their operations in Iraq. By no means am I suggeting that the West is to blame for all the suffering in the world. Globalisation although generally benefitting the rich countries the most, can also prove to be a great force in the development of developing countries. Singapore opened its arms to Foreign investment and has since become one of the richer countries in Asia in terms of per capita GDP. However one must realise that the situation in African nations are very different. Centuries of famine and disease introduced to these counries have left them in shambles, practically making them stuck in an eternal cycle of poverty. Unlike Singapore, they have no port and global connections to a large market.

Somehow again these problems are not being tackled and probably will never be. I was pretty perturbed when i watched a show on the CNN a couple of years back. A man was being interviewed and one of his comments was " It is like saying that it is the duty of richer nations to protect the poor." This sadly has become the mindset of many people around the world. When we ask our friends abuot the suffering in a country like Columbia, the mindset of many is " So what, there's nothing i can do". Of course there is something we can do about it, and it is our responsibility as the international communtity to do something about it. If someone in your neighbourhood was being raped it is your responsilibity to alert the police. As such the West also has a responsibility to help the poorer nations, but this is clearly not the mindset of the west. This idea of survival of the fittest had become generally accepted throughout the world. I am not suggesting that this idea is a western idea and therefore is accepted, but since the west condones it, it becomes accpetable at all levels.

In any case, i believe that the underlying reason for all of this is simply self-interest. When poor countries remain poor, Nike can always produce cheap shoes in sweat shops. Though i am not singling out Nike, it has generally become a symbol of Amercian domination in the globalised industrial world. Of course these poor children working have much to gain form these sweat shops. I mean if they were closed down, they will probably just return to the streets and starve. So this is the justification for the minimal wage rates that are imposed upon these children. Afterall, aren't we doing them a favour? They choose to work instead of starving on the streets. We are acutally doing them a favour. Nevermind that in our own countries if our children were payed $2 a day to produce our clothes it would be deemed as inappropriate. It is not our children afterall, it is probably just a bunch of poor and famished school kids in Pakistan. This unfortuantely is how everyone thinks in our world. We are actually doing them a favour.

Well anyway there's too much to write so i summarized everything. Pretty interesting but yeah i guess someone can always come along and argue the other side of the story.

blogging on sundy morning

2005-05-22T01:01:00.000-07:00

Well can't say life is exactly very fun right now but i can say that it's getting better although i'm freakin bored at home

My friends Srinivas visited me and he brought along a truck load of dvds. We watched
The Grudge
Once upon a time in mexico
Battle royal

Ok the grudge was some scary piece of holy fuckin shit. I screamed once and well it's only once but guys aren't supposed to scream. It was a good movie but i was freakin scary as hell. So if you wanna go and scare yourself, watch the grudge.
3/5......

The cliche are everywhere in this movie but then again this was a remake of an old movie ju-on so other copied it probably...
1) scary girl with fuckin ugly face and long black hair. Maybe this came from the ring of maybe it has something to do with jap culture. Well girl with long black hair is always more scary than girl with long blonde hair.
2)A curse, someone killed brutally and that girl always comes back to haunt people. I mean like what the fuck is up with that. Ok fine you died a horrible death but get over it man and stop haunting innocent people. Yeah make your killer suffer but dude man...... there's no need to make everyone suffer as well.... geez some people just can't get over things.
3)Well there are others but there are way too many.

Anyway i got into LAW!!!!!! isn't that just terrfic news. i'm so happy cos i was waiting and waiting for a freakin long time man!

Shit man i'm damn bored, but i guess it's better than running around and suffering.

Well anyway i'll blog more some othertime see ya guys

Er.... i am so intellectual

2005-05-18T16:56:00.000-07:00

Whoa i realized how intellectual i am haha... er ok nvm my point is i have never ever read 4 books in just 2 weeks. It's like heaven coming to earth, or like hell i dunno which well anyway the point is i have never read so many books before. Well here's the list
John Grisham- The broker
Dan Brown- The Da VinCi Code
Michael Moore- Stupid White men
Robert T. Kiyosaki and Sharon L. Lechter- Rich Dad Poor Dad

My intellectual juices are just flowing.. I can feel them flowing from my brain. Well anyway yeah and all are quite good.

The broker is not your typical thriller as there is actually not actually much guns and brain being blown away. It has a few good ideas but the rest is pretty much what any other author out right now could do. Then again this is what books are now a days. A few good ideas written over 300 pages.
3.5/5

The Da VinCi Code is pretty much your intellectual thriller, just that this one is a little bit more exciting as talks about Leonardo Da VinCi art works. I mean it can't possibly be more interesting to talk about any other artists and the hidden meaning behind their art work. He was a genius in his own right. It's pretty weird when you hear everything but who cares just accept the mystery and the book becomes so much better. It's typical in the twists such that oh my god this person is actually...
3.5/5

Ok, stupid white men is a book you wanna read if you are anti Bush, if not i would be just like reading about any other president and their Draconian actions. Yeah Bush sucks but then again i think almost every other president in the world is. So if you are anti-Bush or just hate America read this book. It has pretty interesting facts, but the bias and one-sided approach can often leave one dumbfounded as the truth seems rather obscure at times.
3/5

Rich Dad Poor Dad is a book about investing. My parents bought my sister a $7000 Rolex watch for her 21st birthday and well my brother wants the same just that he wants $7000 in cash to invest so he bought this book. Ok, it is not a one answer solution to all investing quelms however it is pretty generic and in that, it gives people a general idea on how to get started. It's like fusing common sense with a " Chicken soup for the soul". I actually found his philosophies pretty inspiring. like i said nothing new but by fusing the 2 he manages to glue you to the book until you finish all 200 pages. It inspires me to learn about investing and making money, and it inspires me to right my book about philosophy one day; not bad for a book about money
4/5

On another note, i have created a new blog. It has one posting but i'm going to definitly have more postings soon.I hope for it to be a forum, where people can discuss about the issues i just wanna discuss about. Kinda boring i guess but yeah i actually have an interest in politics and human rights and what nots.. Well if yuo feel strongly about any of the issues just leave a note or something. thanks guys, just wanna knokw how people feel so that i will understand more about certain issues....

www.selonatoutlemonde.blogspot.com

Well anyway please recommend me more books thanks.

strictly an update

2005-05-09T01:30:00.000-07:00

I have decided to go for an operation scheduled on may12th
I borrowed 2 library books. One on globalisation, history of ideas and westernisation of thoughts and beliefs
I had shitty Korean ginseng chicken today that tasted like spring onion chicken and the rice was the colour of blood.
I'm reading stupid white men, and i'm almost done. Gonna read The davinci code next.
Waiting for Law faculty reply.

I love my life

My favourite quotes!

2005-05-06T12:23:00.000-07:00

Life is like a box of chocolates, you just never know what you are gonna get.
- Forest Gump

Life is like a box of chocolates, read the pamphelt and choose your favourite.
- Well for the more optimistic who like to feel that they are in control of their lives!

Don't be so fucking vulgar.
- Well we all love ironies don't we?

Life's like that
- It's classical! Versatile, can be used in any situation! Like when you get run over by a car, life's like that. When your boyfriend of girlfriend dumps you, life's like that. It's all about accepting things and being optimistic!

Go fuck yourself!
- Well er.. I dunno why but I like this one.. there's something magical about it

I don't feel guilty, I feel guilty about not feeling guilty....
- Splendid! What I said when someone asked me if I felt guilty that I was slacking away at home while all my friends were out field suffering. Well life's like that.

Good times have to come to an end.
- Sergeant: Fuck you, you bloody SOC once and you tear your ligament and get to go home.
Well ok there is a double meaning here. One that actually makes sense. Cos tearing a ligament does mean that good times have come to and end. Then there was the sarcasm used to say that yeah armour is no longer part of my life... sniff sniff....

It was like well a holiday just...... BETTER
- Sergeant: So how was your 3 week mc(holiday).. Oh I thought I was such a smart ass... MUAHAHAHA

You asshole fucker
- From my china friend who obviously doesn't know the order in which the words were supposed to be.... fucking asshole is more like it, but the other way ain't bad also.

What the hell are you talrking about?
- Classic Pauline!

That would be highly undesirable.
- Chun Fong. Well this is also another versatile one. Like getting 3/30 for your physics test would be highly undesirable. Or getting run over by a car would be highly undesirable.

She's just insecure
- Alice Kemp. My Australian friend to whom everyone she didn't like was insecure. Well my Fairfield principal was insecure according to her. The macdonalds woman was insecure. I mean insecure is just such an appropriate word to use... Instead of saying BITCH, just say insecure. Beautiful word.

There are only 2 kinds of people in this world I can't stand. Those who are intolerant of other peoples' culture............ and the Dutch.
- Austin Powers.. Sweet

Friend: This is fucked up!
Me: Well what isn't?
- Somehow the reality dawned upon me that everything in the Army is fucked up. So if you wanna say something is fucked up you have to say, this is REALLY fucked up.

You evil do'ers!
- George W. Bush... the age of literature.

Smoke em out those crittter
- George W.Bush... Yeah cowboy!

I don't wanna be boastful, yeah I know i'm good but I don't like to boast about the fact i am. I am good but I don't like to boast about it.
- Anonymous

Car salesman: Hey you know some people actually are attracted to the fact that the car servicing is every 5000 km.
- This was what a car saleman told my dad when my dad complained that one had to service the car so often... I mean why only service it every 15000km and save money when you can do so every 5000km. Like Duh....

His french is not so good, see i've only been in France for 3 months and I can pronounce French words properly
- My Honkie tour guide telling the french wine woman that I couldn't pronounce French Properly. LIKE FUCK OFF YOU HONKIE. NO HONKIE TELLS ME HOW TO PRONOUNCE. YOU CAN'T EVEN PRONOUNCE ENGLISH WORDS PROPERLY SO FUCK OFF.

Do yourself a favour and shut up.
- Something I really wanted to tell Denny...

TO BE CONTINUED....

Second Opinion

2005-05-03T18:36:00.000-07:00

Well i dunno why but i'm really skeptical about the operation so i decided to go see another doctor for his opinion. He was only a gp and didn't want to say too much so he recommanded another specialist. Ok it's not that i don't trust the one i'm going to at NUH but it's just that i really wanna be sure that it is the right thing to do. I guess there's no harm in seeking a second opinion and if this doctor says that the operation should be carried out then i guess i'll just go through it.

So this is what i'm thinking right now about the medical aspect of things. Ok if i don't go for the operation, i'll probably have a loose ankle for the rest of my life. I will be able to do my muay thai and run and all, ( at leas in maybe another 3 months cos it still hurts now even though it's been 5 weeks), but i'll sprain my ankle really and yeah i might just injure it to the point of no return. Ok there is always a point of return, professional athletes tear ligaments and still get back to original form. But yeah I definitely wouldn't want to have to tear it.

Ok And if i do go for an operation there are always risks. Risks exist everywhere. When you design a new building there are risks, when you drive your car there are risks. The risk is probably very minimal and yeh it's like a 00.1% chance something goes wrong. But yeah still there's the risk. There's also no way of saying that in fact going through the operation will solve my problem.... sigh man.... But yeah I trust the specialist! He is very good and well seems professional about his job...

About law, well i really wanna do law. I REALLY WANNA DO LAW. OK this is gonna sound sad but it's real. I'm starting to feel sorry for myself. Somehow after not caring about anything for 18 years of my life, i'm starting to actually care. Here's a list of things.

1) I actually care about the clothes i wear right now.
2) I care about getting rid of my pimples.
3) I care about my school grades. I'm driven to do well when I enter university.
4) I care about what people think of me. Like ok i used to imitate pauline and act like a complete moron. ( Now i'm not saying there is anything wrong with that, because it was funny and brought a lot of joy and laughter to my life), but now like i do care i people think i'm a man or just still a boy.

Ok i'm not sure if you are getting my point, but my point is that i care now. So like maybe that's whats driving me to do law. I somehow want to be respected??? I really dunno. Shit man it's like as if i'm going through a mid-life crisis at the age of 18. Crisis identity, some weird shit like that. MALE MENOPAUSE???? Someone please help me. Oh yeah this has nothing to do with being a clerk. It's not my fault and it has nothing to do with not being an officer cos i don't want to anyway. It's dumb to hate yourself for not having the ambition to do something you don't really wanna do. Like ok there's no point in hating myself for not having the ambition to be a musician or soccer player. Just doesn't make sense to hate yourself for not having an ambition to be something you don't wanna be. But perhaps i feel the way i feel right now cos i simply lack ambition to do anything. So i contort my wants in life, to giving a shit about things. That's why i give a shit about things now? Think so? I come up with artificial wants and goals and maybe this is why i'm so sad. To attain what I don't want has become no.1 on my list of priorities so that i can get respect.... Well this sucks man..... This really sucks... Well right now i want law i'm not faking that, but why i want it is what irks me. I dunno what is cauing my ambition... Maybe i have really just changed and i really am just driven or maybe somehow i am trying to find respect or maybe it's just to conceal my failures. I HAVE NO IDEA.

Well GTG again and yeah shit man i really do mean what i say when i say ignorance is bliss. Why do i bother myself with such weird thoughts.... I should write a book on my weird thoughts one day.

Things to say

2005-05-02T00:28:00.000-07:00

Ok it's been a very long time! Well to start off i'm going for my surgery on the 12th of may to reconstruct my ligament.... i have like a 3 months mc from NS and i'm going to be downgraded to become a clerk... oh how glorious i feel like such a man!!!!! Well anyway i was asking Michelle the other day and she said yeah it does make a difference haha. Like hm... it's more manly to be an officer haha.... but that's ok cos i'm confident and not insecure..... ok i am under confident and insecure but that's ok because i might very well soon know, if i can become a lawyer if i got through the law interview and test, which i really hope i did! Well everyone loves and respects a lawyer. It's like smart and cool. A doctor is like smart but nerdy and weird. i mean seriously doctors are weird people. They become desensitized after and can even find humour in someone's sickness..One of them said" hahaha i dunno what i should write for this old man did he die from old age or cancer haha. So old already should just die, wat's the point of cancer" ... Now if that's not weird I DO NOT KNOW WHAT IS.

Well i've decided that i want to be a lawyer and not an accountant anymore but like i said.... it's really up to my interview and essay. I really hope i got in! i don't wanna count numbers and figures all my life. I wanna go to court and become a litigator. I like arguing and i think i can come up with logical arguements and not be unreasonable at the same time.

Oh my PC is so inspiring, he told me something that well ok not inspiring but well it was nice of him to tell me this... I'm not your platoon commander anymore but take my advice as your senior, make the most of your 2 years in NS. Don't waste 2 years of your life cos life is ( short and you only live once ) implication... Well i guess there is something to that and i do respect him so i guess hey man i will really do something with my life. But i dunno just how to do so by being a clerk... i mean there's nothing much to gain except for the fact that i go home at night which should permit me to do other "life-fulfilling activities". Hm... muay thai? well this is gonna be hard cos i'm becomeing a clerk cos i'm not supposed to be able to do strenuous physical activities. ballet? It's a NONO for Michelle haha. well i guess i can just write my stories but i'll be staring at the computer screen for ages anyway.. So i dunno how to make my life fulfilling man. But i'll find a way. When there's a will there's a way i think or i believe....

Shit man i really wanna meet up with some people to find out what the hell is happening with their lives.. My friend's from Australia who i practically do not keep in touch with. Alice from Australia, Ann from America. I really wanna see how much they have changed, not in terms of physical appearance but like in character and stuff.... It will be cool to hear their view points on certain issues, and well just talk man! I bet we have so much shit to catch up on... and it will be hilarious to talk about old times... Oh i remember the time Ann and I went with Zsa ZSa and Felix fishing....... I think Zsa was pissed that Ann caught so many fish haha. Well anyway after we left she said she caught a big one.... but yeah i didn't see anything..... but i believe her. Or that Time with Alice where she started to pour hot wax over herself! Man those were the days. Absolute bliss and nothingness. I Still don't know the meaning of life but then i didn't give a shit about it. Ignorance is bliss.When you start thinking too hard about things life can become miserable. I am not exactly miserable but i am not happy. Something is missing in my life... I don't know what it is, i never know what i want in life. Somehow i want everything, the best of everything. Maybe that's what my problem is. If i do Law i'll complain saying that I want Accounting and if i do Accounting, i'll complain and say i wanna do Law. I just want the best of everything and that sucks... Someone like me can never be happy... Well time to be pragmatic i guess

Well ciaoz and see ya guys around...
I never felt alone until i met you.

Creep...

2005-04-24T00:05:00.000-07:00

Well today is offcially going to be my last day of enjoyment. Cos tuesday means i'm going back to Armour and that's just shitty. But i'm also seeing the specialist so it could be a good day if he says that i should have my 60 day mc instead of the MO's 3 weeks one... man i can't believe the MO went against the specialist to give me 3 weeks only....

Well i watched creep today and yeah it was really creepy. Man freakin hell the guy shoved a saw up the woman's Asshole or was it the virginia. Ok either way man that's just fucked up... I don't think i wanna watch anymore movies like this anymore... It's disturbing..

Ok i got accountancy at NTU and SMU and that's a good thing and i'm gonig for my Law interview on the 30th and that's good also, thugh i'm skeptical i can get it haha. I don't talk really well but i wanna give it a try anyway i guess.

Well i have nothing to discuss about, actually there is but i think i wanna save energy for my Law essay and to prepare for my interview tmr..

So i'll see you guys ard! ciaoz

2005-04-21T10:33:00.000-07:00

Like some wonderland...

2005-04-21T10:32:00.000-07:00

It's like a fairy tale...

2005-04-21T10:31:00.000-07:00

These are like tunnels where the christians hid from the muslims or the romans... can't remember haha

2005-04-21T10:30:00.000-07:00

Maggie, Cindy and my bro and me...

2005-04-21T10:29:00.001-07:00

I like this photo.

2005-04-21T10:29:00.000-07:00

Argh... it's do damn nice

2005-04-21T10:28:00.001-07:00

I thought this pole was er nice

2005-04-21T10:28:00.000-07:00

This was a house for the prostitues....

2005-04-21T10:27:00.001-07:00

Me and my bro...

2005-04-21T10:27:00.000-07:00

King of the world....

2005-04-21T10:26:00.000-07:00

Immortality! Take it. It's yours!

2005-04-21T10:25:00.000-07:00

blue mosque... Turkey

2005-04-21T10:23:00.000-07:00

Some tall pillar that the Egyptians gave to the greeks

2005-04-21T00:52:00.000-07:00

Fuzzy red creatures...

2005-04-21T00:51:00.000-07:00

Munch munch... what are you looking at? hehe

2005-04-21T00:49:00.000-07:00

MUnch munch munch like oh my god we have nothing else to do

2005-04-21T00:48:00.001-07:00

SWEET...

2005-04-21T00:48:00.000-07:00

Just shitted... Panda Shat

2005-04-21T00:47:00.000-07:00

Water lillies

2005-04-21T00:46:00.001-07:00

Gorgeous rolling mountains... reminds me of crouching tiger.

2005-04-21T00:46:00.000-07:00

Pretty butterfly...

2005-04-21T00:45:00.000-07:00

My bro on a goat that looks like a cow but it's got horns so it's like a goat but it's big so it's like a cow...

2005-04-21T00:44:00.000-07:00

Imagine you are in the centre.IT's like pure estacy.. be swept away.. all your troubles gone.

2005-04-21T00:42:00.001-07:00

Just can't get over the beauty..

2005-04-21T00:42:00.000-07:00

My how beautiful..

2005-04-21T00:41:00.000-07:00

Dancing queen,,,

2005-04-21T00:40:00.001-07:00

Nice waterfall

2005-04-21T00:40:00.000-07:00

My bro and dad in china... nice lake

2005-04-21T00:39:00.000-07:00

Pretty flower in china..

2005-04-21T00:38:00.000-07:00

harloo? harloo? I can't hear you.

2005-04-21T00:36:00.001-07:00

Nice windmill.. spooky but nice

2005-04-21T00:36:00.000-07:00

Notredame.

2005-04-21T00:35:00.000-07:00

tour d'effiel

2005-04-21T00:33:00.000-07:00

Nice bird...

2005-04-21T00:32:00.000-07:00

Majestic... See the little gold man on top

2005-04-21T00:31:00.000-07:00

A bit hard for my liking but yeah still nice..

2005-04-21T00:30:00.000-07:00

Balcony of Romeo and Juillet

2005-04-21T00:29:00.001-07:00

Wrong exit...

2005-04-21T00:29:00.000-07:00

Nice lamp reminds me of a fairy tale

2005-04-21T00:28:00.000-07:00

Beautiful sunset at Venice

2005-04-21T00:27:00.000-07:00

ERGH.. it's leaning too heavy

2005-04-21T00:26:00.000-07:00

Big thing behind and my sis me and bro infront... eyes closed but that's ok

2005-04-21T00:22:00.000-07:00

Fountain of Trevis.. Throw coin a make a wish.. hm...

2005-04-20T21:20:00.000-07:00

happy family at my birthday

2005-04-20T21:19:00.001-07:00

me and shu ann

2005-04-20T21:19:00.000-07:00

me and my best photography pal melvin.

2005-04-20T07:38:00.000-07:00

my sister's birthday and her birthday strudel haha RITZ..

2005-04-20T07:36:00.000-07:00

My birthday.... my sister me and my bro

2005-04-20T07:35:00.000-07:00

The guy in the centre is my fellow CHAO KENG in armour we are both destined to downgrade haha

2005-04-20T07:34:00.000-07:00

My dance partner Daphane and me....

2005-04-20T07:33:00.000-07:00

Inami and me

2005-04-20T07:32:00.000-07:00

Da sexy sheryl and me...

2005-04-20T07:28:00.000-07:00

ANgeline and MOi

2005-04-20T07:27:00.000-07:00

me and carolyn my table tennis friend

2005-04-20T02:02:00.000-07:00

Me, Melv and er PK

2005-04-20T02:01:00.000-07:00

Me and Shirley! My fav dance friend! and strawberry milk addict

2005-04-20T02:00:00.000-07:00

Da clean and clear andriejaussen and Me

2005-04-20T01:59:00.000-07:00

Me and Su ling

2005-04-20T01:58:00.000-07:00

Lina, Me and da bimbo andriejaussen

2005-04-20T01:57:00.000-07:00

me and jo

2005-04-20T01:55:00.000-07:00

Inami, amanda and Felix

Time of my life

2005-04-11T01:10:00.000-07:00

You know i'm actually having the time of my life right now. I just realized how much i enjoy sitting around doing absolutely nothing apart from ok blogging, writing my story and listening to songs over and over again....

It's something unpredictable but in the end is right, i hope you had the time of you life...

Oh my god life is so good. I wish my life could be like this forever... Well because i have nothing to do i just find things to do... So when Miss lina came over the other day i showed her all my photo albums and oh my it's like so damn nice to look at all of them...

Well ok there are some bad things. I realised that my skin was much clearer last time. Not counting theose in sec2 i'm talking about end of JC1. Which is not that long ago. My pimples became really bad when i came to army. I guess i'm ALLERGIC to the army... Dude i wished the doctor could prescribe me something.

My mums says that when she went to the temple the monk said that i would always be happy. I was born to enjoy life. But the way things were going i couldn't see how this could possibly be true... But now i guess hey i'm happy. I was telling Srinivas about my theory of ying and yang... So far so much yang has been happening....( read my entry about armour ) that hey some ying had better happen soon.... and i guess it is haha... it is also about balance between good and evil haha... When you have a forward reaction in chemistry a backward reaction will start and eventually and equilibrium will be reached... so yeah i guess that when so much bad happens so good has to also... there always has to be this balance on earth... That's why earth is between heaven and hell.. too much of either and it steers towards one or the other... But the only problem is that i'm talking about earth as a whole.. and not the individual person.

I mean look at Paris hilton. that stupid bitch has everything that she wants... And yet at the same time, there are so many starving African children out there. So i guess some people absorb more good things and well others have to take the shittty bad stuff. Life's like that.... It doesn't always have to be fair and i'm quite sure many people don't care if it is or not... Do you care?

So anyway about caring... My platoon sergeant is so caring. He called me a champion when i tore my ligament. I mean how caring is that? he said whoa athletes tear ligaments, you ah just run a little and tear you ligament. Hey thanks asshole, like i so needed to know that. I swear to god if he wasn't my sergeant and if my ligament wasn't torn i would have torn his ligament apart. But then again that probably wouldn't have happened cos if my ligament wasn't torn, i wouldn't have thought of tearing his...

Well about photos before europe i went to china...... which will be written about in my next entry..

Ciaoz man

ANGRY

2005-04-08T21:44:00.000-07:00

I'm angry, moody and pissy

I dunno why but all of a sudden the events of the past 2 weeks have been coming to me so i'll just write them down.

Well i have torn my ligaments in my left foot and that makes me feel crappy. Doc says i might need operation and that really sucks. I mean i hope i don't have to not because i'm scared of operations but because i hope it's not bad enough for an operation to be deemed as necessary..... Well anyway i'm just going to write out the events that happened just to make myself feel better so that i can bitch about what assholes some people can be. I wonder if it's humanly possible to be such an asshole naturally or they are just being so because it's part of the job.

Well after jumping off an obstacle... i kinda twisted my ankle and it was made even worse cos i only landed on one foot so the impact was pretty great. Well i didn't really feel anything at first but after walking a few steps i thought something was wrong so i stopped at one of the posts where people are planted. The medic came and when i asked for an ice pack he said that they had run out of them. Like ok the only thing that was going through my head was,how the fuck did you run out of icepacks you mother fucker, but an officer was next to himsoi obviously didn't say that.Well anyway the officer asked if i could was walk back and yes it's painful but like obviously i have to be tough cos i'm a fucking AI trooper so i said yes. Well i was limping back and the Oc just asked if i was ok and i said i injured myself and he said ok and just continued walking so i just continued walking.

It became quite painful so i stopped half-way on the way back. And i gotmy friend to carry my rifle for me. mother fucking sar21 just has to be 8 kg... i mean it's not a lot but walking on a foot with twisted ligaments it's kinda let's say painful. Well the platoon sergeant with a lot of white hair came to me and asked my friend to return the rifle to me and walk back so i'm like ok dude. i guess i wouldn't have mind walking back but i mean like what the fuck is the issue? I'm injured and it hurts so why the fuck should i carry my sar21.

So when i finally reached company line with an SOC timing of about 29 minutes.. i sat down and the others left saying piah kiah pai kiah. and i'm like ok i have an injured foot so like which part of that is funny.. i mean how can some people be such assholes. It's like seeing someone get run over by a car and laughing that they got run over. But i guess some people are just mega assholes so that's the way it is.... Well i finally got my ice pack but after icing for about 3 mins the officer asked me if i was ready to go and i'm like errrr can i ice it some more and he said ok and like he kept on bugging me like every minute so i gace up at around 6-7 minutes... well at leats i was driven back the 70 metres.. which like ok why couldn't i have been for the 600 meres back but that's ok...

So i sat down for a while and like was told to go up staris and change into admin attire and send my arms when i'm back down... So i did just that and came back down and the some mother fucking sergeant told me why send arms you are not going back today.... so i'm like dude you guys just told me to go upstairs and change and send my arms.. man and i had to hope up to the thrid storey cos by then i really couldn't walk already..... and like it's not easy climbing stairs on one foot.....

Well fast forward i was told to wait in my bunk for 2.5 hours and then come down to see the MO..... ok so i came down and yes i was in pain and left wondering why i had to wait so long i mean, like what the fuck, the Mo is having lunch or what... ok well when i went down i had to wait for like another 45 mins i dunno why the fuck i had to but yeah i did and well i was wheel chaired away though hesitantly.. the damn officer asked me if i could walk.. like the what the hell can't you just walk kind of tone...

Well i went to the MO and he looked at my foot for like 3 seconds and said hm.. swollen ok medic give him an ice pack and see if he can walk. That'spretty shitty medicalattention espcially after waiting for about 5 hours from the time of the accident.... i mean what the fuck i could have been given a longer time to ice pack like when the accident had just occured and not 5 hours later when my foot was like the size of my shoe and it couldn't fit in anymore.......

Well in the end i never saw the MO again that day.. which i'm like ok shit man i really waited 5 hours tosee him for like 30 seconds..... The only things he said were. Do you need to be in a wheel chair? can you walk? swollen? ok medic ice then see if he can walk... like dude that just totally sucks.

Well i had to wait for like another 3 hours to come and see a proper and professional doctor at NUH. Well that sums it up. I feel better now but yeah i'm still angry at the treatment. I hope the Mo twists his ankle and has to walk with a permanent limp for the rest of his life.

Well ciaoz see ya guys i feel better.... The MO is a dumb ass he gave me 2 days off and like excuse from running for 10 days... like hello it's been 11 days my foot is still the size of my shoe and i can barely even walk let alone run.. The MO should have his medical license stripped...

Dilemna

2005-04-01T22:11:00.000-08:00

I dunno why i always like to talk about movies that i have watched but yeah this one is pretty nice so i'll just tell ya what the movie is about. It's basically about this little japanese boy whose hand fell into boiling water when he was a baby cos his mother left him unattended for a while, so he had this deformed hand when he was young. Anyway he later becomes a doctor and his hand gets some plastic surgery so it comes back to normal. It's pretty touching and you can really feel for him as he was picked on by all the kids at school for having a deformed hand. Sometimes his mood would turn and he would just start yelling at him mother and blame her. That was pretty sad.... Well anyway he becomes this famous doctor and goes to africa to find a cure for the yellow fever that well bascially tormented the whole of Africa. Anyway his mum is gonna die and he really wants to go back to visit her but he also feels that it is his duty to find a cure for the yellow fever as soon as possible.

So what really is the right thing to do? Go back to see his dying mum or find a cure for the fever.... It's not a really an easy decision and i guess i really wouldn't know what to do.... I mean if would only seem like the right thing to go back but yet you know that the faster the cure is found, the less people will suffer........ I guess it's decisions like this that unfold themselves everyday, what's harder is that you know a certain group of people would not accept your decision either way...

................ off track about decisions, honestly how do we make decisions. Do we do it cos we think it is the right thing to do or do we do it cos we feel people would think best of us if we do it? I mean how often do we really do things if we know it won't go unnoticed. I dunno why i thought of this, maybe it was because clement asked me the question of would you rather be remembered as a complete mother fucker or just forgotten when you die? But yet i mean if i asked you the question, " would you rather go to jail for 50 years or let your whole family die? Most would say yes within 10 secs and yes most would... But if i asked the same question must say that you would be forgotten by them? or they will hate you? It becomes so difficult to answer.. and what's even more true if actually faced with this situation, most would take an extremely long time to choose. even in the first instance..............

Well decisions are something we are always faced with and i guess we all have to face the decisions we made and their consequences... Do we admire the father who works hard so that his children can have a good life but in a way doesn't spend time with them, or do we admire the one who spends time with them? I really dunno what to think... In movies the former is always looked down upon, but the reality is that kids now a days just don't know what they have. Heck man if my dad didn't work his ass off i might not even have a keyboard in front of me right now, so i might now even be writing this. i mean we might say our parents don't spend time with us but yeah have we ever not complained that we don't get the playstation we want or the mp3 player also?

Well just to end this... i must say that i dunno why people say that our modern culture is dead and that it's all trashy now. See even this movie has so much meaning. compare it to some shitful romeo and julliet. It's just about some dumb girl and boy who are in love. yeah they'll kill themselves but like so what the hell. People kill themselves all the time. School, work, stress, cheating husbands, cheating wives. BIG F&*&ING deal man... i mean to romeo and julliet... about killing people killing themselves yeah it's a big deal......

So yeah apart from the above question, one more question is it the weak who kill themselves or the strong who do so? i mean it requires strength to jump off a building. I don't think many of us can even if it was for 50000 dollars on fear factor. Or is it a sign of weakness cos they are unable to control themselves?

Well ciaoz see you guys around!

Armour

2005-03-27T00:01:00.000-08:00

1) No siting on bed till 7 pm... so that means i sit on the floor when i have free time, which is not exactly how i would like to pass my free time...

2) No food and drinks in bunk.. and so that means that i only eat during the 3 meals and the food sucks but i have to eat cos it's the only time i can eat... i honestly don't like fish that tastes like toilet paper and apple juice that tastes like one part concentrate 100 part undrinkable tap water.

3) No discman... so the only music i hear is my own singing and not that it's bad but i don't think i match up to christina aguilera

4) I'm a toilet cleaner.. I learned that cleaning peoples' shit is an unpleasant experience and pubic hair on urinals are rather hard to pull off and unpleasant again it is.

5) I'm arms squad assistant.. which like ok you just draw arms and send arms and take out about 200 magazines and bayonets not very interesting stuff..

6) I'm carrying the metador which means i'll be carrying the heaviest load and that sucks cos carrying heavy load suck.

Life really isn't as good as it was during BMT. But that's how it always is. People speak Chinese as their first langauge and that really sucks cos i don't understand a word of chinese with the exception of CHI BAI, but that's universal and that's therefore not counted. I don't even get my black beret until 7 weeks later. Ok i have the nicest sergeants but my PC is like freakin STRICT, in contrast to my BMT PC which was a woman and that really rocks.

Well i really have nothing to say but negative things and my new motto in life is to be happy so i shall stop here.

A meaningful day

2005-03-26T01:21:00.000-08:00

Well today i went out with miss LINA and it was a pretty good day. She introduced me to a damn nice restaurant but they stopped serving at 2 so we had to leave... Well it was pretty nice talking like i dunno why but it's always nice to have someone to talk absolute nonsense about haha. All our conversations about shit ( literally). Then after we watched SAW. It actually wasn't a bad movie but they really didn't have to make the ending so sad.

Short it was but it was actually meaningful and yeah i kinda realised everything has to be learnt the hard way.

Well ciaoz

In the eyes of despair

2005-03-21T00:55:00.000-08:00

It's really late and i dunno why i'm blogging but i guess i should cos i won't be able to for 1 week. Well i'm feeling kinda nervous right now. I don't really know what to expect when i go for my armour tmr.. It's quite sad really so far i mean from what i see. It looks like the camp was there before Raffles came... Well my mum dropped me off at beach road today.. But it wasn't a pleasant ride... she just kept on yelling and yelling.. Sometimes i really can't take it cos it's high pitched so it resonates in your ears and gives you a head ache. Well anyway on the way back she picked me up again.. she said she was waiting there for at least 10 mins and i didn't see her. So she went on saying how can i ever be in the army cos everyone will die cos of me and that's not very encouraging... Not at all... Well i guess that's the way everyone feels

But i'm sick of complaining and for once i don't want to be a victim of unhappiness and want to welcome happiness. So on happier on a happier note... well. well... erm ok i've finished packing and that's good and like i just ate a chocolate fondant and that's good too.. and what's better is that my mum is driving me to my new camp tmr ... sigh it's like gong into BMT all over again for the first time... but that's good cos new things make life colourful... Wait a wave of nostalgia hits me.. It's just like a sec 1 comprehension i did,

It's about some guy running and some dogs are chasing him.. and when he reaches the end there are 3 doors infront of him. When he opens on it's all nice and all like heaven, but the only problem everyone there is like a robot, all happy but yet ironically emotionless. So he closes the door and opens the next one and inside is like hell, but yet people have emotions and are alive in a sense.. I can't remember what the third door was but i mean it's just situations like this which are so hard to choose... Of course you can run back and get eaten by the dogs which would be unfortunate... So yeah anyway, i guess you can't get the best of both worlds so like colour whatever colour comes by and welcome any heaven that knocks by cos there's only limited on it on earth.. Well of course if you go to heaven when you die there'll be lots of it.. So like erm i guess i'm saying just make the best out of any situation cos there'll never be a perfect one, some has a little bit better here and others a little better there....

Oh yeah i watched American beauty the other day. It was actually quite a good movie! Very touching in the end. Sometimes it's too late when you realise something and then deep seated regret sets in, and that's the way it normally is. Well that's what i get from it anyway...

Well i'm tired, sigh can't blog for for a long time... but yeah i'll have loads when i'm back...
Nights... And yeah Michelle since you seem to be the only one who reads my blog... hi whenever you read this. See ya when i'm back

Back to reality for a second

2005-03-18T23:05:00.000-08:00

Well back to reality for a minute more like it...

I woke up extra early today to drop my brother off at RI for his judo grading. He's so happy that he got his blue belt today. He smsed me to tell me that he got the guy in an arm lock... So i guess he's really into this judo stuff. I guess i'm more into things like muay thai which require less technicalities and just pure punching or kicking... Ok and on the note of RI, it's a pretty nice school and oh my god, i just saw the new RJC next to it! IT's like bloody nice and doesn't even look like a school...it's just like the ACS BARKER new building in the sense that it must have probably cost a bomb... And well the government is willing to sponser such a thing cos they are THE "top" of Singapore.. Well on the way home i just saw some jurong secondary school and the contrast is pretty great... It's just like fairfield. My poor principal had to source around for 3 million dollars and it was a bloody big deal.. For them raising 40 million or was it 80 was no big deal. They even came to my school when i was in Fairfield to ask for money... " Hey like do you want to donate to the ACS barker new building, we are rasing funds for our 80 million dollar building." Like erm fuck off... I'm sorry but i don't believe in donating to those richer than me. If i donate i'll probably want to donate to some cancer or tsunami foundation and not to some rich ass kid who lives in a rich ass house, just so that he can go to some rich ass school as well. Well of course the arguement for schools like RJC is that they should be given the best facilities cos they'll eventually pay back the whole singapore economy and the WHOLE economy benefits, and yes that does make sense. But ACS barker ain't even a top 30 school and most won't actually return the benefits back to society, but actually just go overseas to study and come back with some ameriCAN accent and an all so punchable face.

Well back to my life, I also visited my armour camp.. KEAT HONG. It doesn't even look like a camp but some shack man i thought camps only looked like this in the 1970's.. Sigh it's really bad.. nothing like my BMT CAMP. I expect to see lizard shit on my bed sheets.... and i have a feeling the food is gonna taste like crap.. literally.. The training is gonna be tough but i hope only for 3 months.. Apparently after that it's: wake up, breakfast, sleep. lunch, dinner sounds nice to me. But the reality is probably much worse, The officer told me that the longest route march is 5km. Ok that sounds good but i mean impossible at same time, something just sounds so wrong, there has to be something to it. Maybe it's like 5 km with a rocket launcher in my back...

Well anyway i'm tired i'll continue on with my day later.